Why's it so hard to find a Math tutor? Yesterday I phoned to this place which is close to where I live and thoughts it sounded great, but this morning to of my classmates, who have taken classes here said it isn't very good, so I decided to phone this other place which isn't that close to my place but I liked its ad. The guy I spoke to seemed nice at the beginning, but then he showed he was a sick bastard. When I asked him about their prices he asked me if I could visit the place tomorrow. I said no problem, because it's really close to the CD stores I go every weekend, so I thought I could make a stop before visiting Fnac and Madrid Rock. So then he said "you got to be ready to work!" and I was like "I'm still undecided and I'd like to check some other places..." and then he interrupted me and said "no, you shouldn't check other places. You have no time" so then I wanted to tell him "go fuck yourself!" but I was smart enough to think of a believable excuse: "you see, I have to talk to a couple of my classmates cause they're also looking for a tutor..." but apparently that wasn't enough for him. He said "why don't you come with your classmates tomorrow? We're really close to your school, so you can visit us during your break" and I said I'd tell them about it [and I won't, even though I know some of my classmates are in my situation, but I don't want them to be with such sick weirdo] so then he told me "ok, I'll see you tomorrow. I'll phone you if you don't come" and I was freaking out and kind of scared too, because that bastard knows my number thanks to modern technology [I swear I'll the bastard who invented those phones]

I have some theories about this guy:

1) He's desperate for work.
2) He likes to scare young people.
3) He's a virgin in his 40's and that's why he's so rude all the time.

You can discuss about this theories on the tagboard above. :P

There's nothing else to tell you about. I've been busy trying to memorize almost 80 pages of Economics for tomorrow, because my teacher is a bastard and didn't want to post-pone the exam for next Tuesday [as you can see, bastard is my new favorite word lol] I'm smashed into bits. I so need a nap. lol.

We're in a mess, a danger zone,

Santi

I haven't blogged these days because I thought it wouldn't be too funny to read about my daily routine, which consists in being in front of the computer and doing chores. Ok, it's time to tell you about the Madrid Rock affair. I went a couple of days ago. Half of me was ready to tell that guy I like him, but the other half was paralyzed by fear. The latter half won, as always. I'm so disappointed in myself. When I went out of the store I was nearly crying for being such a coward. I even got lost on my way home. This whole situation is stupid. I mean, I like that guy, I want to meet him, so what's stopping me from talking to him? That's what I don't know. But still, it's really silly to be almost obssesed with someone you don't even know. I get nervous when I think about him. I can't think about anything else lately. I barely eat. Why do I want to meet him so badly? I just want to know. And I want to find out soon.

Leave your fingerprints on everything that I call mine,

Santi

I'm back from my short trip to my old city. And home alone. My parents are in my borntown but I didn't go this time because my cousin Cristina is spending a few days on a friend's home and without her being in my borntown would have no sense. And my brother is at his girlfriend's place because tomorrow they're leaving for a two-day trip to my old town to see their friends. So I'm alone. It's not so different from my everyday life. The only difference is that I can eat whatever and whenever I want. lol.

I'm going crazy. That guy from Madrid Rock is driving me crazy. I like him, and I want to tell him, but I don't have the balls to. I'm wondering and wondering what to do. I could write a note and drop it when I'm paying for a CD, or something like that. I just need courage to do it. Shit, I'm so scared. If I had one wish, I'd ask to be more outgoing. I'd be so much happier. I've missed many things that could've been great for me just because I was too shy to do them. And I don't want to regret yet another thing, but I'm not brave enough to do this. You know, this is a vicious circle. lol. I should do something, because the store is closing in a few days.

I'm just a soul whose intentions are good,

Santi

It's taken me a while, but I've finally updated my links section. I swear I tried to do it yesterday but it kept showing that "unknown page" message after hitting the "save changes" button. I'll keep adding some of my favorite websites.

I have good news and bad news. Bad news first. I told you I was going to dye my hair black with a twist. Well, it failed. I was going to get blue highlights, but this fucking product I bought didn't work. That's not why I'm mad. It's because right before applying it in your hair you have to bleach the part you want to dye, because it works better this way. So I did it, but then when I tried to dye it blue it didn't work, so now all my hair is black except this lock which is yellow/orange. It looks awful. =( Every time I look at it in the mirror I cry. lol. Time for better news. One of my wisdom teeth was removed yesterday, and it wasn't as awful as I thought. Well, yesterday it hurt for a while but now I'm taking four pills a day and I forgot what pain is. lol. My face looks different but not swelled, so it's fine.

I won't go to the protests against Madrid Rock's closing. You know I REALLY wanted to go, but if I want to spend a few days in my old city I have to leave tomorrow, because there are no bus or train tickets for any more days. It's sad I won't get to see my cashier, but I'm thinking of doing something totally crazy and ridiculous. It's so embarrasing that I won't tell you [well, if you want to know about it, just ask]

I live in tomorrow town,

Santi

This is the last post I write before going through the painful process of removing my wisdom teeth. I'm a little nervous about it. I hope my face doesn't get all swelled. This Thursday I want to take part in a protest against Madrid Rock's closing, and I wouldn't like to look like Marlon Brandon in The Godfather, basically because *my* cashier will probably be there, and I'd like to talk to him... If I have the guts to. This whole story is driving me crazy. Madrid Rock will close its doors in just a few days, and though I know it's a little childish to have a crush in a cashier from a store you visit, I really want to meet him. I haven't felt like this since I live in Madrid, and I would hate to lose something that could be good for me because of my shyness. I need a plan, and the balls to make it happen.

I have a tagboard now! =) Drop a line every once in a while, ok? I've tried to fix the problem with Blogger's bar but it didn't work. If you know how to fix it, e-mail me, please. I should start working on my links section, too. I'm so lazy. lol. I promise I'll be focused on it as soon as I get my wisdom teeth removed... if I survive. lol.

I wanna be right by you,

Santi

I can't believe I'm still alive. My exams left me phisically and mentally smashed. Yesterday I was so unvelievable tired after school that I decided I was going to take a nap. Well, I took a 4-hour nap, but it felt so good. I'm going to fail Math and Economics. I DON'T deserve to fail Economics. I mean, I got a 4, it's unfair. If I don't pass next term I'm gonna kill myself, because then I'd have to study in summer and that's something I absolutely HATE. I'm getting a Math tutor for next term, so I hope I can get along with that fucking useless subject. Thank god exams are over. I only want to rest and listen to positive music from now on. ^_^

I went to Madrid Rock this afternoon. That place is really crowded since they announced they were closing. And when I say crowded I mean CROWDED. So I decided to go early [around 3:30 pm] to see if I could finally check the place without having to fight with 1627 crazy people looking through the shelves to get a CD. I was right, and there weren't many people there. I went to the DVD section to see if I could find Sheryl Crow's C'mon America but alphabetical order isn't so alphabetical after three weeks of lower prices, so even though I wasn't in the mood to check the whole section to see if I was lucky, I did it, and returned empty-handed, but found two of my all-time favorite films: Donnie Darko and My Life Without Me. €7.16 each. I'm so happy! lol. My feet were almost dead at this point, and didn't want to check the whole CD section, so I decided to pay for my stuff and go home. And of course, *my* cashier was there. ^_^ I'm a crush whore, I can't help it. I've had a crush on this guy for months and I always pay in his cash desk when I go to Madrid Rock. I bet you wouldn't think he's cute if you saw him. He's very skinny and has this Beatles-ish hairdo I love, and really long sideburns [no, he's not a carbon copy of me lol] I know I'm a little special for my real-life crushes. lol. But this time I was brave enough to tell him something more than "hello" and "goodbye". It was a really short and random conversation, but I did talk to him. While I was paying for my DVDs, I told him "hey, do you know if you're gonna do anything to protest for the store's closing?" and he said "no, not at the moment... Well, actually I have no idea" and he smiled [I thought I was going to melt lol] I also asked if he knew when they were closing and he said his bosses haven't told them about it and he smiled and said "sorry" with a lovely expression on his face [awww]. So then I said "ok, thank you! [big smile] See you!". I told you it was random. lol. I'm planning on coming back this weekend for another 30-second conversation. lol. He's gay... How do I know? I simply know. :P

I think I'm getting sentimental lately. And I mean ridiculously sentimental. The other day, while looking for e-cards for Andrew's birthday, I saw this and couldn't stop crying for 15 minutes. That final line and the music simply killed me. Let me know if you liked it, ok? I was also watching tv this evening and saw one of those awful talk-shows where people go to tell everyone about their problems. There was a lovely woman who hadn't spoken to her only sister for 13 years. What made me feel awful was that it was a missunderstanding. Apparently, her sister's husband told his wife that she was telling bad things about her to everyone. But then they showed her sister was also in the studio, and when they met they started to cry and cry and huged each other, and I thought it was such a beautiful moment. Yes, I know it sounds corny but I suppose there's something wrong with my hormones. I wonder if I'm pregnant. lol.

Enough.

I know something about you, you don't know,

Santi

I haven't blogged in a while because Thursday and Friday were hectic: I had four exams. Plus, I did a weekend trip to my borntown because one of my cousins [well, he's not my cousin, but I know he's some kind of distant relative] was getting married. What a shame, he's so hot. lol. Well, I didn't attend the wedding because I thought that spending some time with my cousin Cristina would be better. We did what we usually do, and though most people think we're boring, I always have fun just by curling up watching a movie. By the way, I can't believe Liam Neeson was snubbed by the Academy for Kinsey. He's excellent!!! Peter Sarsgaard does a brilliant performance too. I hope he gets a leading role soon to show everybody what he's capable of. And what about Laura Linney? Well, she's always lovely. ^_^ We also rented some movies I've seen at least once, but are so good that I don't mind seeing them again: House of Sand and Fog, which is awesome, Four Rooms, which is so over the top that I love it, and... well, you'd kill me if I told you I saw this film [and it's not my first time...] Just a little hint: Five girls, one group, one rocking world. Did you get it? lol.

This is the last week I have exams!!!! Thank god. I always get REALLY stressed when I have exams, it's like if I weren't myself for two weeks: I barely care about what I wear, I have strange attacks [this afternoon I wanted to eat tuna so badly that I thought I'd die if I didn't lol] and I'm usually in a bad/suicidal mood. I just want to finish all these exams. I'm going crazy. o_O

Dirty little secrets, dirty little lies,

Santi

I'm sick of exams. Doing at least one per day is killing me, not to mention that those antibiotics I'm taking leave me k.o, so I'm taking another pill to avoid sleepiness when I'm at school, and that's something my stomach can't bear, so it hurts most of the time, but otherwise I'd fall asleep at school [no kidding], so I guess it's better this way. I think my grades will be better this term, but living in a state of constant nervousness it's driving me insane. I just want all this to end, and rest for a while.

The Oscars didn't have as much surprises as I thought. Clint finally got Best Picture and Best Director, which he deserves, but I feel sorry for Martin Scorsese. I think he'll never get a "regular" Oscar, but I predict they'll give him the honorary award sometime this decade or in the first half of the 10's. After looking at my predictions for the main categories you must think I suck at predictions, but I don't. :P Even though I loved Hilary's performance in M$B, and though I've already said this, I think Annette did deserve the Oscar. Poor woman, I can totally picture her punishing a voodo doll with Hilary Swank's face. lol. Don't worry, Annette, you'll get one as Supporting Actress in twenty years or so. lol. And now let's be frivolous and talk about fashion! My best dressed list includes Renée Zellweger [though she looked like she was just released from Auschwitz], Cate Blanchett, Pe Cruz, Kate Winslet, Ethan Hawke [who looked outrageously fuckable! lol], Natalie Portman [though her hair was so-so], Scarlett Johansson [same as Natalie], Helen Mirren, Jeremy Irons, Kirsten Dunst, Maggie Gyllenhaal and Jake Gyllenhaal [this guy is what I call S E X] and in my #1, Gwyneth, oh Gwyneth. Simply stunning. I won't be bitchy today and I won't talk about the worst dressed [Johnny and Julia, you're lucky lol]

The always generous Andrew has included this tiny little blog in his links sections. Thank you, sweetie! Let's see if I get more visitors now, or at least more than two. lol. This is all, folks. I'm watching ER and I want to do some revise for a while before going to bed. Take care!

Why do you love me?,

Santi